Don’t Tell Grandma About Your Divorce

Mid adult woman talking with her mother at home.
Advice from Friends and Family

Family gatherings can be a tough time for you when you are going through a divorce, or have a child custody, visitation or support dispute with your partner.

Did you talk about your divorce or family law problems at your last family get together?

If so, your family and friends may be showering you with well meaning, and potentially harmful, advice.

Be careful if they tell you to:

-–Stop working full-time, change to part-time, to avoid paying support to your spouse or partner;

-–Take your spouse’s name off all your bank accounts; or move all the money to hide it from your spouse until the divorce is over;

–Change your beneficiaries on all your life insurance policies;

-–Terminate your spouse or partner from your health insurance;

–Incur new debt (car loan/credit card ) so you can reduce your support; or,

–Have a family member contact your spouse or partner to let them know they better accept your settlement proposal or else.

Once you settle with your spouse or partner, resist the urge to discuss the details of any settlement in your case. Your friends and relatives don’t have all the details of your case and may be very emotionally invested in getting a specific result for you.

Mistakes early in your divorce or family law matter can cost you money, including money you may have to pay your spouse or partner’s attorney in addition to your own attorney.

Speaking to an experienced family law attorney may help you avoid costly mistakes.


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